


The Doctor And River Show

by Leyenn



Category: Doctor Who RPF
Genre: Christmas, F/M, New Year's Eve, New Years
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-01-01
Updated: 2013-01-01
Packaged: 2017-11-23 04:07:28
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,516
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/617906
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Leyenn/pseuds/Leyenn
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After seeing the final cut of <i>The Snowmen</i>, Matt imagines the unthinkable. Luckily Alex is able to set him straight.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Doctor And River Show

The phone rings just as he's putting the finishing touches to his tree, tall and sparkly and drowning in lights. It's a tree the Doctor would be proud of, though it looks a bit bare still with no presents underneath. Last minute ADR and press work is taking up too much time for him to be organised at the moment - it's going to be another mad Amazon shop this year. That's not actually a bad thing, he thinks, looking at the number as he picks up the phone. Half of those he needs to shop for are on another continent anyway.

"Hello," he says, and clicks pause on his cheesy seasonal playlist.

" _Merry Christmas,_ " Alex says. He smiles, flopping long-limbed down onto the couch and pulling a length of tinsel out from under his back.

"Merry Christmas. How's L.A.?"

 _"Decadently festive,"_ and she laughs a little. " _How's Cardiff?_ "

"Raining. Windy. Cold. Hasn't changed a bit since you left." Which feels like months ago. Was it really months ago? Christ. "We got to see _The Snowmen_ today," he says, winding the tinsel through his fingers.

" _Oh,_ " she says, sounding suddenly excited." _How does it look?_ "

"Brilliant." He grins. Of course there are no FX finished yet - they always run to the last minute - but the edit is all but done and he can already tell it's going to be an amazing episode. He misses Kaz and Arthur and Alex with an ache still, but Jenna is cool and they get on like a house on fire. She's great fun to bounce off and they have a definite chemistry starting to develop, one that he's gratified to see coming through on screen.

" _I saw the promotional shots,_ " Alex says. " _Very handsome,_ " obviously teasing but sounding appreciative, too, or is he just imagining that? He's never sure with her.

He chooses to take it the way he'd like to: 'tis the season, after all. "Thanks," he says, grinning.

" _You got your something purple in the end, then._ "

"Yep." He's been hankering for ages for a bit of a change - she must have seen that interview, somehow. He loves the new coat. He's really hoping he gets to keep it. The hat, too, since River isn't around to demolish it for him.

He must have sighed thinking about that, because the next thing Alex says is; " _Something wrong?_ "

He probably shouldn't admit it, but she did ask. "It's a bit rubbish not having you around," he says, after a moment.

She laughs down the line. " _As much as I'd love it to be, it's not 'The Doctor and River Show', though, is it?_ "

"No," he admits, and he does see her point, and he _is_ happy with how the show's going - new wardrobe, new companion, new sets, there's even Gallifreyan on the walls and a proper high-tech console for him to play with now, it's great. And he does love being the star - who wouldn't love being the Doctor?

Still, it would've been nice to have Alex back in the second half of the season, just for one episode at least. He really hopes Steven has something up his incredibly long and devious sleeve for the fiftieth and beyond, because it just doesn't feel right if -

" _Matt?_ "

He blinks. "Hmm?"

" _I thought you'd hung up on me,_ " she says, teasing, and he winces.

"You are coming back, aren't you, Kingston?"

He can picture her sudden frown so clearly it's like he's hearing it. " _Matt?_ "

"I mean..." He clears his throat. It feels tight suddenly, like he's... well, like he's just imagined something horrible. "What if you're not?"

" _Not what?_ "

"River," he says, and she sighs gently down the phone.

" _You're not making any sense, darling._ "

"What if you're not River again," he forces out, trying to make it _make sense_ for her when it's only just formed in his own head, and when he really doesn't want to even think about it. "I still want my wife," he says, and good God he sounds like a five year old _and_ like he's gone totally bonkers, how brilliant.

" _Matt..._ " she starts to say, but it's too late, his head is all twisted up with the idea - it doesn't make _sense_ to the plot, anyway, what is Steven thinking, he can't just cut her out and have them never see each other again, it doesn't _work._ It's not like River is the one trapped in the past, is it? Of course the companions leave or the Doctor leaves them but not - she's his _wife,_ she's _River Song_ , surely it's not the same -it's not like they've filmed even a tenth of the things they've hinted at -

" _Matt!_ "

Alex shouts so loud it actually makes him jump. He holds the phone out for a moment and frowns at it before putting it back to his ear. "What?"

" _Take a deep breath,_ " she says, very calmly, and he shuts his eyes and does as he's told. It does make it a tiny bit better, he'll admit.

" _Now,_ " she says, and he wonders if she's laughing at him, _"would you please relax? There is such a thing as getting too involved with your character, sweetie._ "

"Says the woman calling me _sweetie_ ," he retorts, slouching down into the sofa. Alex laughs properly at that, a warm sound in his ear that makes him hug the phone even closer.

" _Steven knows I would be back in a heartbeat, and he knows the fans love River. I'm sure I'll get a call eventually. Besides, you're in a far better position to influence him, as if anyone ever can._ "

He hasn't thought about that. That really does make it better, to think he can try and do something to ward off the terrible idea of never seeing her again. "I'll put in a good word, then," he says, relaxing a bit.

" _Please don't be hyperventilating when you do._ "

He scowls even though she won't see it. "I was not hyperventilating!"

" _I could hear you,_ " she says, with more gentle laughter. " _You know, if you miss me that much..._ "

"What?" His heart is absolutely not racing for different reasons now, at the possible endings to that sentence. Absolutely not. "If I miss you that much, what?"

She puts on that flirty, playful tone. " _That depends._ "

He grins. "On what?"

 _"Well, on whether you miss me, or River, I suppose,_ " which is the last thing he expects to hear.

"You," he says instantly, indignantly. "What do you mean, _or River_ , you ridiculous woman? Of course it's you. She _is_ you, except that I get to kiss _her_ ," and that's when his brain catches up to his mouth and he screws his eyes shut and bites his lips and sinks right down into the sofa and _oh, fuck_.

There's a long, long silence. He can hear the annoying tick of the clock on the wall, the wind outside the window, the hum of his laptop forgotten over on the table. If she thought he'd hung up earlier, he's damn sure she has now.

" _Well,_ " she says, quietly.

Oh. Apparently not.

"Um," he says. Eloquent it isn't, but it does about sum up everything in his head right now, or at least everything that isn't swearing at himself.

" _Matt,_ " she says, and he winces and tries to breath around the tightness in his throat.

"Alex-"

" _I'll be visiting my parents for New Years,_ " she says, sounding very careful about it, and no, he was wrong before. _That_ is the last thing he could expect to hear.

"Oh," he says. "Oh. Um."

" _I'm landing on the twenty-ninth. Salome will be with her father. I'll email you the flight details, shall I?_ "

He hopes he's not hyperventilating again. "Um. Yeah. I... okay."

" _I'm going to go now, sweetie,_ " she says gently, as if she's telling him to _put the dangerous phone down now, that's it, gently does it, no sudden movements, let's not scare it_.

"Okay," he says, softer this time. He's trying to process this but it's not working. "I'll - you'll email me."

" _Yes._ "

"Okay." He tries to clear his throat. "Alex?"

" _Yes?_ "

"Merry Christmas." It's incredible how he gets it out without his voice breaking, he's grinning so wide.

It turns out he can picture her smiles just as clearly as her frowns. " _Merry Christmas._ " And then the line clicks and she's gone.

It's four in the morning before he actually sleeps, on the sofa in his jeans and t-shirt with the phone still in his hand because he's either too afraid or just too amazed to move, he'll never be completely sure which.

*

She emails him. He emails back; they arrange to meet up in London since filming is done until the new year now and he won't make her come to Cardiff just for him, not on such a short trip. So London it is, but he's still too nervous to meet her at the airport _Love Actually_ style because they haven't actually spoken since that call and he's not sure what he might do. He's not sure what _she_ might do. He is, though, definitely certain what the press will do, if he's photographed in the middle of Heathrow meeting his on-screen wife for a rather off-screen visit.

Part of him wants to try and fly under the radar instead, nerves be damned; another part of him feels sneaky and clandestine doing it, and that's the part that almost wins out until the very last minute, when he checks the live arrivals on his phone that morning and finds himself texting her number. _Don't worry about a cab._

He doesn't get a reply until she's landed and through security, of course, but he's counted on that and on what she'll say. _That's very sweet, Matt, are you sure?_

 _I'm in the short stay car park,_ he texts to her, because by that point he is, sitting in his car in a corner spot with his phone in his hand.

 _Well, if you insist,_ she sends back, and Alex isn't one for smiley faces but he doesn't need one to read her tone.

Between baggage delays and the holiday season, it's still almost another hour before the knock on the passenger side window startles him out of reading his Google feeds and pretending he isn't waiting for another text. He looks up as she pulls the door open: she's bundled up in a black trench coat, scarf and hat against the damp weather, but - unlike the press - he doesn't need the dead give-away of her hair to know who's tracked him down.

"Hi," he says, and Alex's smile is about the loveliest thing he's ever seen.

"Hi."

He scrambles out to help her with her bags, and they squeeze everything into his boot somehow with a little swearing and Alex trying not to laugh at how seriously he takes the challenge. He probably should have cleared out the rest of his crap first, but it works in the end.

"Um," he says, watching her buckle in, and Alex doesn't try to keep from laughing this time.

"Really? You've had three weeks to find something to say to me aside from 'um'."

It's true, but he's also closer to her right now than he has been in months, and closer than he's _ever_ been since sort of managing to admit that he'd very much like to be allowed to kiss her, please - oh, _please -_ and not just because of a signed contract. Every conversation he's imagined in those three weeks, which is a _lot,_ has of course gone completely out of his head.

"Well, I rented a place-" he starts to say, and then realises - _oh, fuck -_ how that's going to sound and if he had a scriptwriter on hand he'd have a witty way to rescue himself but apparently, he's just screwed. He runs his hand through his hair. "Oh, damn it, I didn't mean-"

"Matt," she says, calm just like she was on the phone, with that gentle hint of _everything is fine,_ coupled with _you do know you are being ridiculous_.

He knows, he just can't help it. This is terra incognita, somewhere he never seriously expected to be, not with her. "I should just..." He puts his hands on the wheel and takes a deep breath before she can tell him to. "I'll just drive, shall I?"

She smiles. "Now, that's a good idea."

So he drives. Or at least he tries; it's _seasonally_ busy and he has to keep stopping to let other people in, which is beyond frustrating when what he really wants is to be out of Heathrow Bloody Airport and heading toward his rented Docklands apartment at the fastest possible speed.

At least, somehow, the silence that falls between them isn't awkward - and why would it be when it's Alex, who's always put him at ease? This is easier, too, because he's driven her places before; this is familiar, he knows what to do with this.

"So how was the flight?" he asks, to stomp down on his nerves and for something to say while manoeuvring as best he can toward the exit.

"Oh, fine." She looks over at him, just as he looks at her. Her smile this time is rueful, and he notices how her head is tipped back against the seat. "Just long, and it never gets any shorter."

Without thinking, he reaches over from the gear stick and squeezes her hand - as if he absolutely has the right, as if that's just something he'd normally do, just because she sounds tired.

Alex's smile brightens through her obvious exhaustion. "Thank you for coming," she says, and her voice warms the whole car.

He feels like his face might break as he grins, that faintly amazed feeling settling on him again. "Any time, Miss Kingston."

*

"This place is lovely," Alex says. She's taken herself on the quick tour while he was in the loo, it seems, and now she's leaning against the wall watching him make tea.

"Yeah," he says, as he stirs sugar into her cup. This is good: he can do tea. Tea is easy, although right now tea also feels hideously complicated, because he is making tea for Alex and although she like any actor will drink whatever hot beverage is available when needed, this is something _he_ is giving her, and it has to be good, it has to be _great_ , it has to convince her that-

"Matt," she says, in a very soft voice, and now she's not leaning against the wall any more. She's right up close to him and her hand is taking his and he looks at her and realises she can see. Fuck, she can see all of it, his nerves and his exultation and his absolute mortal fear, all of it.

He opens his mouth to say something, but all he can think of is _um_. He shuts it again.

She smiles at that - and it's that small, quiet, flirtatious smile, the one River gives the Doctor in her most honest moments except this time it's all Alex. Christ, no wonder she's so incredible an actress, if she's putting such depths of herself out there for everyone to see.

She looks down at their hands, and he follows her gaze; he's still holding the teaspoon. It's something like an out of body experience to watch as she takes the spoon away, rests it very carefully on the counter and then, slowly lifting her head to meet his eyes, puts his hand lightly but very deliberately on her waist.

She's warm, and not wearing layers of costume and tight body-shaping underwear but a pale green shirt dress over blue jeans, and through the soft flannel he can feel her skin. She's barefoot and properly shorter than him, and her eyes are big and green and fixed on his face.

"Is this the part, then," he says slowly, quietly, and also nervously because it's actually an honest question, "where I ask if I can kiss you?"

Alex leans into him and smiles. "Yes."

Oh, bugger, he can't resist. "Yes, this is the part, or yes, I can kiss you?"

She rolls her eyes and swats him on the chest but she's grinning: she set that one up for him, he thinks, and would have been disappointed if he didn't take it, and he thinks _this is okay_ , he can't be nervous about this. This is how they are, him and Alex, this is why he's wanted this, this is why they _work_.

"Well, are you going to ask?" Her voice is throaty like he's never heard it, and teasing like he has a hundred times. He grins.

"But you already said yes." She's said it on the phone when she didn't hang up on him, and in the flight details still sitting in his inbox, and in the way she turned her hand to squeeze his in the car before he had to take it back. It's been there in the way she just said his name, in his hand on her waist, in the way she keeps _smiling_ at him, and he doesn't know how he got this lucky but he does know - he is _sure -_ that her answer is _yes_.

As if to prove him right, Alex rolls her eyes again and pulls him down into a kiss.

Her mouth is hot, and soft, and sweet, and just like he remembers except this time there are no cameras or crew and the only bright lights going off are behind his eyes because he is _kissing Alex Kingston_. Her fingertips are hot, too, resting on his bare skin above the low-slung neckline of his t-shirt; he slides his hand around behind her back and she leans closer, so close that she's just a column of warmth against him, all familiar and new.

She hums into his mouth, and again when he pulls back to just... look at her. In his arms, flushed and wide-eyed with a grin to match his own.

"Yes," she murmurs, eyes twinkling with laughter, and bites her lip just the same way she did on set after that final take, and it turns out it's a thousand times more adorable when it's just her, not a trace of River in sight.

He laughs and wraps his arms around her and hugs her tight.

*

She has plans that she can't cancel - plans that she has flown all this way for - and he would have refused to let her change them even if she'd tried to, even though their final parting kiss behind his closed door is so bloody sweet he almost reaches out and locks it with her still inside.

But he lets her go, and she lets him let her, and that's good. They don't want this to be something fevered and crazy, even if that is how he feels right now; they want slow and real and making sure it goes right.

With that in mind he tries to get through New Year's alone with Jools and his Hootenanny like he planned, he really does. Until he gets this _idea_ halfway through a bottle of very good red wine, and then once he's thought about it he can't really not do it, can he? He'd regret it terribly.

At two minutes to midnight he's dialling her mobile. Thankfully the gods of technology are with him this holiday season, because it only takes two tries to get through even with the networks probably clogged to high heaven.

It rings so long before she answers that he's almost afraid she won't at all - and then she's there on the other end of the line, sounding a touch out of breath.

_"Hello?"_

"Hi," he says. There's noise behind her, music and the chatter of voices.

" _Well, hello, darling._ "

He grins at her suddenly husky tone. "It's nearly midnight, Kingston."

" _Yes it is._ "

"So." He slouches down into the couch, remembering the last time he was on the phone with her. "How's the party? Whatcha doing?"

" _Oh, you know. Drinking, dancing, lining up a gaggle of gorgeous men to kiss at the stroke of midnight._ "

"Best get them all prepared then," he says, as the clock ticks and the countdown starts: ten. "It's nearly here."

" _Well, I'm a bit distracted right now, I suppose they'll just have to wait._ " Nine. Eight. Seven.

"Well, I could hang up..." Six. Five.

" _Oh, now, I didn't say that_." Four. Three.

Two.

One.

"Happy New Year, Alex," he says softly, as Jools kisses everyone in sight and somewhere fireworks explode over the Thames. He can hear it in the distance and he can definitely hear it in stereo behind her, through the cheers and the beginnings of Auld Lang Syne.

" _Happy New Year, darling,_ " she says sweetly back to him, obviously smiling - it may not be a kiss at midnight, but for Matt, right now, it'll absolutely do.

And when he's back at work, he's definitely going to put that word in. Just in case.

**

**Author's Note:**

> I have RPF guilt but I also have fear of River not returning, and I couldn't not write it once it got started in my head.


End file.
